(k)erimenopause

One broad's reluctant journey to the dark side of womanhood.

Announcing my new business: fitKO’ April 19, 2011

Filed under: Losing Ground — kerimenopause @ 1:53 pm

I seriously do not know why I didn’t think of this earlier! I’m obsessed with my weight ~ it goes down, it goes up. It never stays in either place for more than six or seven months.  Add that to the idea that I need a project/job/hobby.  And, viola a business in the making!

A little background here.  I’ve spent literally 80% of my life trying to lose or maintain my weight.  It all started in 5th grade when my mom put my sister and I on Weight Watchers.  Sister was thin as a stick and I had a little pot belly.  Which, by the way, I have had to varying degrees ever since!  Now I’m not here to criticize my mom.  I think she has always fought her weight BECAUSE her mother didn’t do anything but criticize her weight.  That said, you can’t grow up with three older sisters plus a mom who was on every diet imaginable without picking up a few bad eating habits of your own.

I would like to spend the 2nd half of my life obsessing about something entirely unrelated to hips, thighs, sizes and portions.  I’ve been pondering a way out of the wicked web of weight for a long time.  Lo’ and behold, during my leisurely nine-hour drive home from Montana, it hit me:  I am my business! My epiphanies often startle me, too, so don’t be alarmed if you suddenly had to slap yourself in the forehead and scream, “Of course!”

Think about it.  I could write a really snappy business plan.  Maybe something like:

fitKO’ is a Kerri-only health club and program that creates a personalized environment for Kerri to pursue her fitn goals.  We don’t have the best equipment and or the best training program in this arena. We aren’t sure how to prepare our client for success!  We certainly do not have the best weight-management program.  But what we do have is persistence and a client that needs a focus on getting fit.

1.1 Mission

The mission of fitKO’ is the following:

  • Create a one woman-focused workout environment that promises to get Kerri to:
    • fit into a reasonable single-digit pair of pants
    • fit into a non-jaw dropping cup size
    • fit into a full-size mirror without having to take 10 steps back
  • Celebrate the success of our client in meeting her fit goals with:
    • manis and pedis
    • membership to the Shoe-of-the-Month club
    • really expensive Vodka (but only because it has no calories to speak of)
OK, so the truth is I have tried all these things before – like who hasn’t, right?  But there is something so much more fun making it an honest business.  Work from home. No overhead. Create your own schedule.  See what I mean?  Sounds pretty damn good doesn’t it!
Can’t have a business without a marketing plan… here’s my start:

This marketing plan is a means for fitKO’ to refocus Kerri’s attention away from the daily lattes and toward a daily carrot. This will involve rebranding, refocusing activities, and redeveloping many lifetime convictions in the coming six months. Follow up and careful examination of results over the next several months will determine whether this marketing direction is having the desired effect.

1.1 Goals

Personal Goals:

  • Devote 45 minutes a day to exercise – all done in really cute workout clothes and shoes – just in case someone happens by.
  • Make her accountable by applying unpleasant consequences to behavior.  IE. treat like a spoiled 2 year old when she misbehaves.
Are you feeling me?  If we make ‘us’ our business, it kind makes you feel like you have to be accountable to something other than the Lays chips.  Seriously think I have something going here.  Maybe I should put on some running shoes and hit the treadmill and ponder this… or, maybe I better call a board meeting with me, myself and I to see if there is a 100% buy-in.  I can tell you right now, they are a seriously tough crowd so I have some convincing to do!
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One Response to “Announcing my new business: fitKO’”

  1. Kristi Says:

    Chuckling, much-needed belly laugh Kerri, lololol!!


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